What's with the Underwear?

I'm horrified to post that I just overheard the following:

Lucy (a little horri-shocked): "What? I hope you have more than 1 pair of black underwear!"

Mackey: "Nope."

Lucy: "That is DE-SCUSTING. You better hope mom doesn't find out you've been wearing the same underwear since Wednesday."

Me: !!!!!!..."Excuse me, but I couldn't help but overhear your conversation (mostly because Lucy was saying it loudly enough for that purpose). It's Sunday. You've been wearing that underwear since Wednesday?"

Mackey (smirking): "Yep."

Me: ?!?!..."Well, that's just gross. You're gonna be lucky if I don't tell everyone I know how gross that is. Go up, take a shower, and look for your hygiene while you're at it."

Guess Mackey wasn't so lucky on the publicity.

Homemade Underwear

You know what I LOVE about my Sunday meetings? That I don't have to discover my six year old in homemade underwear as I'm getting ready to run out the door (late, of course) for church. APPARENTLY as Jon was getting the posse out the door, Mackey says, "I made my underwear." Upon further examination, it turns out that, yes, yes he did. Out of bubble wrap no less. WT....Heck.

Stupid M&Ms

It's a good thing I don't drink. Cuz I'd be an alchie fo sho. As it stands, I'm an M&M-ie.

I just threw away a partially...ok, mostly...finished bag of M&Ms. Not in the bag. Cuz I might go all George Castanza on it. No, I emptied out the contents into the trash can containing unsavory diapers so as not to be tempted.

Luciella Bella

I've gotten so accustomed to Lucy's awesomeness that sometimes I overlook it. I totally take her independence, intelligence, and responsibility for granted. These are her latest, most massively impressive feats:

1) This morning, Lucy was telling me about a boy in her class who teases her when she goofs up something or has a clumsy moment (by her own admission gives him plenty of opportunity). She told me that it embarrasses her. We discussed several different ways of handling the situation; one being a direct approach. The one major roadblock to addressing him privately is that he ALWAYS hangs out with this other boy. If she asked to speak to Adam in private, she feared the whole 3rd grade assumption of romance. As she got of the car for school, I wasn't sure what, if anything, she'd decided to do.

After school, she was telling me about her day.

Lucy: "oh yeah, I talked to Adam today. It was no big deal. He won't bother me anymore."

Me: OH MY GOSH!!! What a brave girl I have!!! "WOW! Tell me about it!"

Lucy: "I just asked him if I could talk to him before recess in private. I asked him if he knows how he teases me when I trip and stuff. He said 'yeah'. I just told him that it embarassed me and asked him to please stop. He said 'ok'. Can I make some Chinese food?"

She's amazing. That takes guts. She's just awesome. She's one of those kids that doesn't need 'the crowd'. Not yet, at least. And I sure hope it stays that way.

Next.

2) Chinese food. She has this culture report that she needs to have the food for in school tomorrow. As I'm flying solo and up to my eyeballs in whiney boys, we talked about recipes that she could do on her own. She picked one out. We picked up the extra ingredients. And...THAT KID MADE COCONUT RICE. ALL ON HER OWN. Stove top, measuring, the whole nine yards. I'm not 100% sure I'd done something like that in college, let alone elementary.

She's just pure awesomeness.

Party in My Bathroom

My morning started with a party. A Star Wars party. In my bathroom.

As I was getting ready for the day, Calvin made an evasive move into my bathroom:

Calvin: "Mom! Darth Vadar out dare!"

Me: "This early in the morning?"

Calvin: "Mom! Goo guys out dare, too!"

Me: "They must be really tired."

Calvin: "We have to save them!"

Me: "Okee dokee, artichokee."

Next thing I know, the little boy who scandalously picks his nose, snickers as he burps, and farts for laughs was cordially (where did the sense of urgency go?!) inviting his imaginary Star Wars friends into our secret hide out. The funniest thing? He looked at me rather impatiently when I didn't formally greet our 'guests'...because acknowledgement of the rebel forces clearly wasn't enough.

Calvin: "Mom, this is Rex."

Me: "Hi, Rex."

Calvin (looking rather expectantly at me)...

Me: "Nice to meet you, Rex."

...and so on to the rest of the forces.

The saga continued into my shopping foray as well. We went to The Rack where Calvin rattled on and on and on (which is really endearing) about how he would be build me a ship with the help of Rex and Ben 10 (sometimes we combine our overly violent cartoons) and escape the Null Void...much to the entertainment of all the ladies around us.

Abort Mission!

I ran into a friend at church yesterday who asked me why I hadn't posted in a while. I'd responded that Facebook makes me lazy...and uncreative. It also robs me of my forum for blowing off parenting steam. (But it totally satisfies my adult onset ADD...).

True to form, lest this be considered among the 'my family is so perfect, come read about them' blogs, I am ranting and soliciting...

With summer lurking around the corner...do you love how it 'lurks' these days as oppposed to 'approaches'?...I'm afraid. My kids fight more than I can stand. Mackey needs an anger management course - I wonder if Jack Nicholson is available? Seriously? I almost sent this kid to school in his underwear cuz he was freakin out so hard about getting dressed. Getting them to do chores effectively and efficiently is taking years off my life (but don't worry, I hate housework too much to cave).

I stumbled upon a great little parenting blog through my local newspaper that promises quick parenting tips or, in my case, reminders.

Please. Wish me luck...and ideas if you have them. Remember, I didn't grow up with siblings. So, I'm WOEFULLY lacking in practical experience.