Do you ever just have a bad...driving day? I, who pride myself on being far more attentive at the wheel than my husband, had a bad driving day today. And for clarification purposes, the reason I drive everywhere is this: Jon was driving my mom and I somewhere in DC Beltway traffic when I was like 9 months pregnant. I'm yappin' with my mom when I turn to face front and get an eyeful of bumper coming at us pretty quickly. I "rouse Jon from his slumber" in time for him to hit the brakes. So, I'm a bit of a control freak in a car. Or we might just say he's narcoleptic http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Narcolepsy, but then Jon said he'd use that line in church.I can actually say that I hit stuff (yes, in the plural) today with my car. And not in my "I want a 
Hummer with concrete bumpers so I can hit stuff" or 'towanda' http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0101921/quotes kind of way. More in an 
"oooops! Was that a boulder?" and "huh, I didn't think that the car had the turning radius to hit the fence" kind of way. (And, off the record, and I can write this cuz my husband never reads this blog, I drove over two curbs to boot! Today!) Seriously. And this is how I know my husband loves me (or still can tolerate me): he just laughed, asked the kids if mommy's license should be revoked, and apologized to the car for the abuse she was suffering at my hands. To the tune of a scratch and dent and possible damage to transmission and muffler. I haven't had the time to check out these minor details yet...
Hummer with concrete bumpers so I can hit stuff" or 'towanda' http://www.imdb.com/title/tt0101921/quotes kind of way. More in an 
"oooops! Was that a boulder?" and "huh, I didn't think that the car had the turning radius to hit the fence" kind of way. (And, off the record, and I can write this cuz my husband never reads this blog, I drove over two curbs to boot! Today!) Seriously. And this is how I know my husband loves me (or still can tolerate me): he just laughed, asked the kids if mommy's license should be revoked, and apologized to the car for the abuse she was suffering at my hands. To the tune of a scratch and dent and possible damage to transmission and muffler. I haven't had the time to check out these minor details yet...
Just to complete my moronification? I couldn't even drive the stupid cart in Lowe's today. We took down a small display of tile. Who does that? It was okay, though, cuz the guy who helped clear a...wider path?...for us had told me minutes before that he "liked my style". It's the hats; I don't leave home without one.
Or maybe he meant my parenting style? Ok, ok, catch your breath; I was only kidding. But we are 'T minus 2" and counting on trying out the Smart Discipline approach http://smartdiscipline.com/. Wish us the best.
7 comments:
I prefer to let Ben drive so that I can blame him for anything that goes wrong. I also send him out with shopping lists so I can blame him for how much money gets spent. He has yet to call me on the fact that I am actually the one who writes the lists and tells what to purchase. What the heck is Smart Discipline.
Oh, and I meant to end my question with a ?
Sounds like you might need a good night's sleep Rach!
If you're going to hit stuff, at least do it in style, right? It was good to hear from you on my blog. Hope you are doing well in Texas, although we miss your family here. It's a bummer--right when we were getting to know the family you had to move! Hope you guys have a Merry
Christmas!
Hilarious. I love this blog!!
Your posts are so very witty and right on.
You know what I hate driving? Those carts in IKEA that have all wheel drive. Crazy.
Those carts at IKEA are such an anomoly to me...I mean, IKEA is so good at packaging and efficiency, and then they have that TORTURE device of a cart. I'm with you; that thing stinks!
we're at ccrewfive now!
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